This time my mother was able to accompany me for my follow up consultation. She really is fantastic, approaching 75 and willing to get the 7.30am train up to London. She finds it too tiring to get the tube these days so we cab it around which I must admit is a real treat for me.
The consultant was delighted that my mother had come with me. She was just as pleased that the investigations showed nothing untoward and I didn't need surgery to remove the fibroid. She was insistent that I should only go for one round of IVF and see how I respond to the drugs. She mentioned that there is a higher chance of success if more than one egg is implanted at the same time but I very firmly said I didn't want that. The prospect of bringing up twins on my own is too much. I couldn't imagine being able to cope with that. The consultant warned me of the risks of IVF to me and the baby and reminded me in the nicest possible way that my chances are slim. As we left she wished me lots of luck.
I then saw the nurse who ran through all the practical details such as choosing my sperm donor, transferring my frozen eggs from the other clinic where they are stored to this clinic - in case I don't produce any fresh eggs and we need to use my frozen ones. She also explained the drug protocol the consultant recommended I go on. When I had had my eggs frozen previously I had taken a nasal spray for around two weeks which shut down my own fertility so that they could control me with the drugs. This time because my fertility is so low anyway they won't shut anything down because that may result in me becoming totally infertile. As a result I was given a prescription for very strong drugs to inject daily to boost the number and quality of follicles and hopefully eggs I will produce.
Next I had an appointment to see the counsellor whom I had missed last time. She was very helpful. We spoke about me needing emotional support for the process. I'm well aware of this and feel I have told enough friends and family so that there is usually someone I can talk to about it when I need to. I thanked her for the useful resources she had sent me. I'm gradually working my way through a self help book on fertility, or lack of it, which encourages such things as attempting to keep the treatment in perspective and do enjoyable things along the way, know that there is always a plan B if IVF fails totally and other useful ideas of which I hadn't thought.
I left the clinic feeling so much better than last time; positive and excited. I had the prescription and all I needed to do was buy the drugs and choose the sperm donor. I could start the treatment at the beginning of my next period. My mother and I met a close family friend for a celebratory lunch at the House of Commons where I treated myself to a very stodgy pudding. I was finally good to go.